Has It Really Been Five Months?

What a crazy, fun, busy, joyful, exhausting, emotional, and wonderful five months it has been! 

So many times, I wanted to sit down and take a few minutes to update our blog and add a few pictures of Jia, but busyness got the best of me.  Snuggling got the best of me.  Our new daughter got the best of me.  My family got the best of me, and I wouldn't do it any differently.

Jia's transition has been pretty remarkable, in my opinion.  If I had written down my ideal adoption story, this would be better than I could have imagined.  I was expecting more health issues.  We've miraculously had none.  (She's barely had the sniffles in 5 months.)  I was expecting more attachment issues.  After reading all the attachment books, I was expecting a much harder road.  We've still got a long way to go, but I am incredibly thankful for how far she's come in just five months.  But most of all, I'm just head over heels for this little girl and her sweet and spunky personality. 

That said, adoption is still a difficult thing.  It took me months to admit that.  I thought for a long time, "This is a challenge, but it's by no means 'hard'."  Well, at around the 3.5 - 4 month mark, I finally admitted to myself that it was hard.  (Sleep deprivation may have had something to do with that. haha)  As wonderful as our new daughter is, the adjustment of adding a new family member, whose emotional needs are great, is just plain hard.  It's not like having an infant who sleeps for the better part of the night and day.  With her, it's full on, all day long.  Putting off the many things that need to get done so that I can bond with her, is hard.  When she says, "I suh-nuggle mommy fa minute," you can bet the laundry will not be getting folded nor will the dinner be getting cooked.  (We've had more than a few crummy dinners.)  I'll be snuggling on the couch with my girl.  Foregoing 'personal' time was necessary for a while.  She needed her mommy available.  Even now, I'm careful about how often I am out without her.  I love getting out with friends or just going to a movie alone (yes, alone), but if Jia is having a 'less than good' day, I'm not leaving the house without her.

Another challenging part for me has been taking time away from the other girls, or, rather, having less time to be with them.  Navigating one on one time with each of the older girls while tending to Jia's needs has been quite difficult and I haven't been great at that.  I've offended my girls more than once, but we are getting to the point where I can tell Jia that mommy needs to spend time with one of her sisters and that we'll be going out for a while.  Just last week, she didn't even come up from the basement to say goodbye.  She just said, "See you later, Mommy.  Have fun."  Wow...talk about progress.

In these last five months, we've had some high highs and some low lows, but overall, we feel amazingly blessed and our lives are changed for the better by our wonderful new daughter.  I feel tremendously humbled and thankful that God chose me to be her mommy. It has been such a faith builder to all of us to see His hand working in our lives through our new little one.  

Here are some pictures of the last few months.  See you at the six month mark...maybe.  ;)